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Become a Global Ambassador for Self-Worth. Text us your feedback!
Join us in this heartfelt and profound episode of Transacting Value as we explore the transformative power of resilience through the lived experiences of our guest, Dina Lantzer. From a challenging upbringing in a domestically violent environment to navigating the aftermath of a suicide attempt, Dina shares her journey with raw honesty and courage. Our conversation delves into the intricacies of post-traumatic stress, coping mechanisms, and the role of detachment as a survival tool, while highlighting Dina's spiritual journey and reevaluation of faith as key elements in her healing. We also examine themes of self-worth and how life experiences shape our personal value systems, encouraging listeners to reflect on their own paths of self-discovery and healing. This powerful narrative underscores the importance of vulnerability and diverse perspectives in fostering growth, and we hope it offers inspiration and encouragement for your journey. Your stories matter—they shape who you are and who you can become. Tune in, share your thoughts with us, and don’t forget to subscribe and leave a review as we continue building a community rooted in resilience and understanding.
(11:36) https://www.va.gov/disability/
(32:46) Porthouse Tampa Bay Realtor
Visit https://justdina.com/ to learn more about Dina and her services.
Looking for more perspective, empowerment, and self-worth?
For a chance to hear your question answered on the air, remember to Subscribe and Leave a Voice Message at TransactingValuePodcast.com!
We'll meet you there.
An SDYT Media Production I Deviate from the Norm
All rights reserved. 2021
00:00 - Introduction to Transacting Value
10:00 - Defining self
37:00 - A discussion on post
01:08:00 - Introducing Dina Lancer and her life story
01:30:00 - Navigating the complexities of trauma and healing
03:20:00 - Lessons from detachment and resilience
05:10:00 - Embracing unconditional love and grace
06:48:00 - The balancing act between skepticism and faith
08:00:00 - The value of seeking different perspectives
WEBVTT
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The views expressed in this podcast are solely those of the podcast host and guest and do not necessarily represent those of our distribution partners, supporting business relationships or supported audience.
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Welcome to Transacting Value, where we talk about practical applications for instigating self-worth when dealing with each other and even within ourselves, where we foster a podcast listening experience that lets you hear the power of a value system for managing burnout, establishing boundaries, fostering community and finding identity.
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My name is Josh Porthouse, I'm your host and we are redefining sovereignty of character.
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This is why values still hold value.
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This is Transacting Value.
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That version of me that attempted suicide wasn't going to be a lasting version.
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Right, I had to figure out something else to do, because I couldn't be that person anymore.
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Today on Transacting Value.
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Post-traumatic stress affects everybody and most people differently, for different periods of time as well, and so what happens when that stress and those stressors last for decades and seem to compound and become more and more complex?
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More importantly, how do you get through them and how do you get over them if you're able?
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Today's guest we're talking with Dina Lancer.
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All about how she's done it, the things that have impacted her life and the things that have ultimately affected her perspective today to become the brilliant, beautiful and, all things considered, productive person she's become.
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Today.
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I'm your host.
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I'm Josh Porthausen from SDYT Media.
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This is Transacting Value, dina.
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How are you doing?
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I'm great.
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How are you, Josh?
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I'm good.
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I'm good.
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I appreciate you being so flexible and giving us some of your time.
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I know you've got a life and an evening to take care of, plus a family, so I do appreciate your time too.
00:02:05.492 --> 00:02:07.826
I want to open with this.
00:02:07.826 --> 00:02:18.550
I think this is important in a lot of new relationships especially, but for everybody in our audience who's unfamiliar with you aspects of your story, let's just start there for a couple minutes.
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Who are you, when are you from and what sort of things are shaping your perspective on life now?
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Wow.
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Fantastic question, big one.
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I'm originally from Nebraska, grew up in a small town, I am a 54-year-old wife.
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I've been married for 33 years.
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I have three kids, all grown, and four granddaughters, ages 3 to 15 now.
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So fun, full life.
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For sure we had a dramatic, I guess traumatic.
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It was interesting listening to your intro this time because I have had a lot of chronic PTSD in my life.
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I grew up in a domestic, violent household and just didn't stop.
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I guess.
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When I was 27, I attempted suicide because of the massive amount of depression and bipolar stuff that I experienced as a child and the trauma just didn't end.
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We've ended up in our marriage of 33 years.
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We've experienced pretty much everything you can experience, from adultery and addictions, teenage runaway to actually our daughters being molested.
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Our oldest daughter was on the streets, a drug addict.
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We took custody of her kids.
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So it's been a really full 50 years.
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Yeah, really, really robust life experience You're packing into some short periods of time here.
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I must have a lot of karma, or just a really big, really hard headed.
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I can't figure out the lesson.
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I'm not sure.
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Yeah, maybe.
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But you know something interesting that comes with all that too is you know, if there's any sense or semblance of credibility to past lives or whatever karmically maybe you had coming for whatever reason, is that you now is strong enough to handle it?
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And so you know, whatever it's become and whatever it's going to continue to be as a platform to help other people or a platform for a story, whatever it is, the amount of inspiration that comes with that degree of resilience, but then also the ability to communicate it effectively and with enough grace to process it and keep your head on straight that, I think, is the bigger feat and the bigger accomplishment to focus on.
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So you listed a lifetime's worth of experiences in half the time.
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Did it also seem to go through that quickly, twice the speed, one thing after another?
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Or was there enough downtime for you to like I've grieved, I've moved on, I just got hit again.
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So one thing interesting about me is I don't normally grieve a lot.
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My husband is the griever, I'm not, and to tell you the truth, it doesn't even feel like my life.
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So I don't know if I have this ability to detach so well from everything.
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I can look back on all my past experiences and think is that my life?
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Did I go through that?
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Because I think I drifted through everything at such a and I want to say high level, but it really wasn't probably a high level, it was just a detached level, if that makes sense.
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And I'm sure, I'm sure, a thousand percent sure that I learned how to detach from trauma at a young age, right, and so it has served me to some degree because I've been able to utilize all of the things that I've gone through to really kind of be the driving force in my life to try to heal, try to figure out why, how to help other people with their traumas, how to to escape trauma myself, how to help my kids through traumas.
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I put them through Right, because, even though, even though my parenting was better than the parenting I had my parenting was better than the parenting I had it still had its issues, I can promise you, and so, even though and it's beautiful I'm so grateful that I have fantastic relationships with all of my kids and grandkids, in spite of the casualties that I caused by not healing my own unconscious wounds.
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But the whole idea is to hopefully help them be better parents than I was, so that my grandkids don't have the sufferings that we've all had for generations.
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Not what we do is we stand on the shoulders of those who went before us.
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Well, that's what we're supposed to be doing.
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I think oftentimes we help hold up other things.
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But yeah, that's the goal.
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I suppose you know and it's interesting too you bring that up.
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I've got a buddy and he's got now.
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He's got two girls, but at the time he had one girl and one boy and he said between he and his wife that his goal is in some sense to be a good father, but his primary focus is in her qualities of the type of woman that he should be looking for when he grows up.
00:08:12.976 --> 00:08:20.619
And it was such an interesting perspective that I hadn't really considered before, because then it's not really based on firsthand experience.
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You know what I mean.
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I can't grow up in whatever capacity or role I have in society for the daughter that I don't have, and so even if I did, I can't forecast that.
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But I think in your case, to the point you just made, there's so many different aspects of what you went through On one hand the receiving end, on the other end, transmitting it and then interpreting it and then communicating it from an outside perspective that I'm curious.
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I guess, even if it were as a defense mechanism that you detached and sort of stepped back initially, has it always served you well as a mechanism to process.
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I would say yes, I don't know if my husband would agree, honestly.
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Yeah, I don't study a ton of astrology stuff, but I am an Aquarius and Aquariuses are detached.
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Typically they have an ability to detach.
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I have a really strong spiritual nature and so I have a very strong connection to my creator and I think that's been a well.
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I'm sure that's been like a primary force in my life to help me continue to just go through and go through, and go through and go through and, at the same time, being able to detach like I said, detach really from a lot of the right here right now stresses.
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I'm able to just pull away from it and not allow it to affect me to the point where I can't make decisions and I can't get up or I'm catatonic or anything like that.
00:10:10.408 --> 00:10:10.809
I had.
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I had in 97, like I said, when I was 27 attempted suicide because I really did believe that I would never be happy.
00:10:18.740 --> 00:10:24.234
I didn't think that I would ever, ever be happy.
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I mean, there was just, you know, I would never be happy, even though I was married, had two daughters at home, right, a three-year-old and a five-year-old, or four and six, something like that, and see even that like I just felt like, honestly, when I attempted suicide I didn't think that I was loved, I could never be loved, I could never be happy, and that was just a story that was repeating for myself.
00:10:48.188 --> 00:10:52.140
And you know, the meds finally kicked in.
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About six weeks later I went to a traditional old building psych ward.
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They closed most of them now, but that's where we went.
00:11:03.145 --> 00:11:11.648
In Nebraska I spent six weeks with people who were really really really struggling with things and I was to an extent too.
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Obviously.
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I argued with one of the counselors who was talking about self-esteem and I said I don't have a self-esteem issue.
00:11:20.006 --> 00:11:25.811
I feel just I'm good and she's like people with good self-esteem don't try to kill themselves.
00:11:25.811 --> 00:11:28.105
It's like, oh, that's interesting.
00:11:28.105 --> 00:11:29.389
Yeah, you're probably right.
00:11:32.660 --> 00:11:35.090
Alrighty, folks sit tight and we'll be right back on Transacting Value.
00:11:36.961 --> 00:11:39.850
This message is from the US Department of Veterans Affairs.
00:11:39.850 --> 00:11:51.490
Va disability compensation is a monthly tax-free payment to veterans who got sick or injured in the military and to veterans whose service worsened an existing condition.
00:11:51.490 --> 00:12:00.389
You may qualify for VA disability compensation for physical and mental health conditions that developed or worsened due to service.
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Learn more at vagov slash disability service.
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Learn more at vagov slash disability.
00:12:10.664 --> 00:12:13.317
I argued with one of the counselors who was talking about self-esteem and I said I don't have a self-esteem issue.
00:12:13.317 --> 00:12:14.059
I feel just I'm good.
00:12:14.059 --> 00:12:18.269
And she's like people with good self-esteem don't try to kill themselves.
00:12:18.269 --> 00:12:20.562
It's like, oh, that's interesting.
00:12:20.562 --> 00:12:21.844
Yeah, you're probably right.
00:12:21.844 --> 00:12:24.889
I should probably look at that.
00:12:27.472 --> 00:12:46.296
That's an interesting point to bring up too, because you feel normal yeah, it's like an impressionist painting, I think If you picture yourself in the painting as one of of the painted figures, it's normal.
00:12:46.296 --> 00:12:53.051
And then to anybody looking at the painting, they're like uh, that's a little warped, something's off there.
00:12:53.051 --> 00:12:55.365
You're like nope, this is just how the sky looks from here.
00:12:55.404 --> 00:13:21.208
I don't know what to tell you that's such a good example because there's a lot of that, not not specific to your ideations or circumstances, but the distance, the intentional distancing, let's just say, based on that comment you just made, lack of awareness and self-esteem that maybe you didn't notice at the time.
00:13:21.208 --> 00:13:30.384
I think the interesting point to that, people that have, of the people that I've talked to, I'm not a psychologist, I'm not a psychiatrist, especially for anybody new to the show.
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In fact, most of my professional career has been in the Marine Corps infantry, and so we just tended to walk really far and have to shoot really well and carry a heavy pack.
00:13:41.846 --> 00:13:53.066
You know like there's no real psychological impact to society from what we did, compared to a psychiatrist in that same role.
00:13:53.066 --> 00:14:04.570
But the conversations that we would have on these long walks with these heavy packs involved a lot of detachment and psychoanalysis and conversations about these types of things.
00:14:05.500 --> 00:14:13.215
Most of it tended to be sarcastic, like oh, this hike is never going to end, kill me now, type comments.
00:14:13.215 --> 00:14:15.668
But it's not quite the same, right.
00:14:15.668 --> 00:14:27.849
And so, yeah, I think it's interesting that a lot of these, let's say, enduring exposures to high stress occupational environments tends to be the same sort of humor and perspective.
00:14:27.849 --> 00:14:38.639
And so we detach to cope, not necessarily in defense, just to process, and so a lot of what you're describing is like to me firsthand.
00:14:38.639 --> 00:14:46.089
Circumstantially I'm not there with you, but I think in terms of the idea I get exactly what you're describing.
00:14:48.452 --> 00:14:53.466
Wow, especially in hindsight yeah Well, that just hit me now.
00:14:53.466 --> 00:14:56.940
Yeah, especially in hindsight, you don't remember details.
00:14:56.940 --> 00:15:03.451
Not that the details didn't happen, it's just you didn't pay attention to them because you detached from stress or whatever.
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Yeah, I don't think I had the ability to be present Because you detached from stress or whatever.
00:15:07.360 --> 00:15:16.644
Yeah, I don't think I had the ability to be present, because I've thought about that recently, because, again, it's like watching my grandkids grow up.
00:15:16.644 --> 00:15:22.292
I'm able to be much more present with my grandkids than I was with my kids.
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My kid's childhood doesn't seem like I lived that experience, like I just don't like where was I?
00:15:35.600 --> 00:15:35.961
But I was in that.
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In that period of time, like when I got out of the hospital at 27 years old, I went through 12 years of intensive renewing of the mind.
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Right, I went and it was intensive, and so I was really focused on trying to heal the traumas that I had and just figure out who I was and who I was supposed to be and who could I be, because that version of me that attempted suicide wasn't going to be a lasting version.
00:16:09.196 --> 00:16:16.923
Right, I had to figure out something else to do, because I couldn't be that person anymore, if that makes sense.
00:16:17.947 --> 00:16:18.629
What changed then?
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What was the trigger?
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Well, the suicide attempt obviously was the big trigger.
00:16:23.361 --> 00:16:34.009
But when I got to the hospital or actually a week before I got to the hospital because I was it's interesting I was suicidal, but I was never on a suicidal watch.
00:16:34.009 --> 00:17:04.424
Just because I kept saying a legit like I'm not happy, I have no desire to live, like I'm like telling the doctors like this isn't working, I don't want to be here, I really feel like I just need to the karma thing die and come back and try this again because I don't like what I just experienced, I want something else.
00:17:04.424 --> 00:17:16.361
And literally a week before I got out of the hospital, I had said a little prayer, kind of offhandedly, and I said God, if you're real, show me that you love me.
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And I woke up the next day and the sky was bluer than it had ever been.
00:17:24.026 --> 00:17:26.406
It felt like I had sunglasses on my whole life.
00:17:26.406 --> 00:17:31.990
This weight that was on my the shoulders, the world on my shoulders, was gone.
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Everything was different.
00:17:33.711 --> 00:17:35.373
I was happy for the first time in my life.
00:17:35.373 --> 00:17:41.336
And you know, the doctors and everyone was like the meds kicked in and I'm like probably dead.
00:17:41.336 --> 00:17:43.077
The meds kicked in, right.
00:17:43.077 --> 00:17:58.815
And then a week or so later I got out of the hospital and we went up to Minnesota to visit my husband's family because that's where they lived, and we ended up visiting a church because his family are very strong Christians.
00:17:58.815 --> 00:18:06.732
And we ended up visiting a church and, honestly, josh, like God, met us there in a very tangible way.
00:18:06.732 --> 00:18:23.586
And so we moved from Nebraska to Minnesota a week, two weeks later and we just went home and packed up our house and moved and just because we thought 10 hours was too long to commute to go to church on, Sundays.
00:18:25.167 --> 00:18:32.817
So that gave me, like this, really strong, and I tend to be an all or nothing kind of person, right, black or white.
00:18:32.817 --> 00:18:34.224
I know it's a thinking.
00:18:34.224 --> 00:18:41.964
I get that I have a lot more gray now than I used to, but I just dove in and recreated myself.
00:18:41.964 --> 00:18:44.589
Just dove in and recreated myself.
00:18:44.589 --> 00:18:55.440
Now I stopped smoking, stopped drinking, stopped doing all the things I was doing and just dove head in and became completely transformed.
00:18:55.440 --> 00:19:22.933
So when our daughters got molested and it just start, oldest one started going through all of the she was running away at 16 and just all of the trauma that she was going through, this church family that we kind of devoted our lives to just wasn't there at all and it really caused me to start looking for, for more meaning.
00:19:22.933 --> 00:19:37.011
I guess if you could say that my relationship with the creator definitely went through some ebbs and flows but now is stronger and more expanded than it was before.
00:19:37.741 --> 00:20:11.366
But I think because I've had a really strong relationship with something outside of me, something bigger, bigger than me, I've been able to maintain I don't know some sort of yeah, perspective maybe perspective is a good word, yep yeah, and you know what's interesting too and this isn't necessarily specific to any religion or or whatever, but mine being rooted in christianity, let's just call it the holy spirit you can't inhale that, and I mean that is internal.
00:20:11.366 --> 00:20:21.484
Even well, spiritually, and whatever that is, yeah, is you doing it?
00:20:21.484 --> 00:20:23.407
You know?
00:20:23.407 --> 00:20:31.525
I mean so there's still a certain degree of self-reliance and self-awareness, maybe unwitting, maybe subconscious, but that's there.
00:20:31.525 --> 00:20:38.948
And then I think faith is where that ends and carries it the rest of the way.
00:20:38.948 --> 00:20:47.946
So the amount of resilience that you've been able to build not to analyze you just since you brought it up that you've been able to build through all that analyze you just since you brought it up that you've been able to build through all that stuff.
00:20:47.967 --> 00:20:54.976
There's a lot of circumstances in my life where I started trying to better identify how do I manage this?
00:20:54.976 --> 00:20:59.355
How do I handle this?
00:20:59.355 --> 00:21:08.186
I got married in 2012, about a week after I got back from Afghanistan, and I thought everything was fine.
00:21:08.186 --> 00:21:25.114
I was like this is, like I said, the sky always looks like this in my painting, but I didn't realize I was hanging in a museum, you know, and so I started having people, my ex-wife included, describing this painting.
00:21:25.114 --> 00:21:29.410
That didn't make any sense to me and it took the better part of a decade for me to start processing and grasping that.
00:21:29.410 --> 00:21:32.828
Oh, this isn't what it actually looks like.
00:21:32.828 --> 00:21:40.986
There are some issues here, brushstrokes or whatever, and that is interesting.
00:21:40.986 --> 00:21:41.627
You brought it up.
00:21:41.627 --> 00:21:53.193
But then does that give you some degree of authenticity now, or acceptance, ownership now, or you still feel like you're distanced.
00:21:54.615 --> 00:22:24.948
No, I've learned, actually, that embodiment of that spirit like you talked about, where for a long time, it was always outside of me and and as I've learned to hold it myself and realize that that love comes from within, not without, I think that's where I've started to really anchor into it.
00:22:24.948 --> 00:22:56.578
Maybe it is interesting, though, and I'm kind of curious, because when you said, other people around you were telling you I don't know if this is the way the painting, I don't know if these are the right breaststrokes, right, I find that interesting because I think everyone has these like beautiful perspectives, and it doesn't make it right or wrong, it's just a perspective, and we all need those perspectives for a variety of reasons.
00:22:56.578 --> 00:23:06.329
Right, just like the world needs 800 million different flowers, yeah, and just all gives us a different.
00:23:06.329 --> 00:23:12.224
It just makes for different perspectives on everything, and I certainly have a lot of perspective.
00:23:12.224 --> 00:23:16.019
I understand that, but I get that all the time.
00:23:16.019 --> 00:23:17.181
Is people don't?
00:23:18.063 --> 00:23:22.289
I hear from other people how that was profound.
00:23:22.289 --> 00:23:24.480
I can't believe you shared that so easily.
00:23:24.480 --> 00:23:25.804
This, this was really vulnerable.
00:23:25.804 --> 00:23:26.505
You know fiction.
00:23:26.505 --> 00:23:28.880
I'm just like I have no idea what you're talking about.
00:23:28.880 --> 00:23:29.603
This is just.
00:23:29.603 --> 00:23:31.660
This is just what I do.
00:23:31.660 --> 00:23:33.645
Right, it's like a fish in water.
00:23:33.645 --> 00:23:35.261
I don't know how to swim, I just swim.
00:23:37.816 --> 00:23:40.263
Alrighty, folks sit tight and we'll be right back on transacting value.
00:23:43.015 --> 00:23:49.249
Alrighty folks, if you're looking for more perspective and more podcast, you can check out Transacting Value on Reads Across America Radio.
00:23:49.249 --> 00:23:52.884
Listen in on iHeartRadio Odyssey and TuneIn.
00:23:55.976 --> 00:24:00.166
I hear from other people how that was profound.
00:24:00.166 --> 00:24:02.363
I can't believe you shared that so easily.
00:24:02.363 --> 00:24:03.700
This was really vulnerable.
00:24:03.700 --> 00:24:04.403
You know fiction.
00:24:04.403 --> 00:24:05.056
I'm just like.
00:24:05.056 --> 00:24:06.782
I have no idea what you're talking about.
00:24:06.782 --> 00:24:09.544
This is just what I do.
00:24:09.544 --> 00:24:11.598
It's like a fish in water.
00:24:11.598 --> 00:24:13.222
I don't know how to swim, I just swim.
00:24:14.205 --> 00:24:14.446
Right.
00:24:14.446 --> 00:24:41.996
Well, that's sort of the loophole or caveat, I guess to the point, because it's not always bad or ever necessarily, depending on what you do with the information, but I think there's indicators based on societal patterns or biases, things that you can recognize, as this is more commonplace than what I would have done or whatever from what I'm hearing.
00:24:41.996 --> 00:24:45.824
You know what I mean Because I spent a decade getting told, hey, I'm cold and I'm distant.
00:24:45.824 --> 00:24:48.409
I don't think so.
00:24:48.409 --> 00:24:53.340
I think I'm just processing it okay, and it sounds an awful lot like what your responses were.
00:24:55.164 --> 00:24:55.987
It might still be.
00:24:55.987 --> 00:25:08.402
My husband probably still thinks that to an extent he's got the emotional bag Let me just put it that way, I don't want to call it baggage he goes, he's cancer.
00:25:08.402 --> 00:25:24.595
So again, not a whole lot about astrology, but the cancers have all of the emotions and the Aquarius's tend to be detached, and so he definitely feels things and processes things way slower.
00:25:24.595 --> 00:25:30.743
Because I'm able to be detached from things, I'm able to make a decision very quickly, and I don't have to.
00:25:30.743 --> 00:25:39.651
Either I know through my intuition what the right answer is, or or I don't, and it doesn't matter.
00:25:39.651 --> 00:25:40.815
I'm just straightforward.
00:25:40.815 --> 00:25:59.780
I'm gonna plow ahead and fix it, figure it out as we go, and my husband will take weeks or months to process things, and it gives us a good balance yeah, yeah, well, yeah, maybe a harmony at least.
00:26:01.022 --> 00:26:09.020
You know, having having that sort of insight, especially as a couple, I don't think that's something you stumble on and you're like, well, that sort of insight, especially as a couple, I don't think that's something you stumble on and you're like, well, that's interesting.
00:26:09.020 --> 00:26:10.477
And then you move on to the next tuesday.
00:26:10.477 --> 00:26:19.214
Right to me that sounds like it takes an awful lot of work and conscious effort and willing and witting participation and presence in a relationship.
00:26:19.214 --> 00:26:21.979
So how do you develop that?
00:26:21.979 --> 00:26:24.602
Because it didn't sound like at one point you really wanted to.
00:26:25.703 --> 00:26:30.029
No, I think, a commitment to unconditional love and grace.
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What do you mean grace?
00:26:33.597 --> 00:26:37.425
Grace is choosing to see the other person ahead of yourself.
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Grace is choosing to not judge the person for wherever they're at and whatever they're going through, because you're not looking at the at the speck in their eye through your plank, right?
00:26:52.490 --> 00:26:58.517
You're choosing to go okay, well, you've got what you've got, going on and it's and it's been both ways.
00:26:58.517 --> 00:27:04.285
Like my husband has laid out so much grace for me, my husband has laid out so much grace for me.
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I've not been an easy walk, I can promise you that At all Right, but it's just like learning to live in that layer of grace.
00:27:16.980 --> 00:27:18.409
And, like I said, unconditional love.
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Unconditional love is love without a condition attached to it.
00:27:22.846 --> 00:27:26.461
Bottom line love is love without a condition attached to it, bottom line.
00:27:26.461 --> 00:27:39.218
And I think that we were, we were born, babies are born as unconditional love and I think our whole objective of life is to come back to that state of unconditional love.
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That's the god right, that's that.
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That's that outside creator.
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It's unconditional love do you think it's coming back to that point or developing a conscious awareness of that innate point?
00:27:55.876 --> 00:27:59.642
it's a really good perspective.
00:27:59.642 --> 00:28:02.965
I don't suppose you can go back to it.
00:28:02.965 --> 00:28:07.612
You'd have to develop the insight and the awareness.
00:28:07.612 --> 00:28:12.605
And you're right, it's a conscious decision all the time.
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Like to grow in tandem with it or parallel to it whatever the reference is there as opposed to growing away from it and then cycling back.
00:28:24.067 --> 00:28:25.998
Well, okay, but that says a couple.
00:28:25.998 --> 00:28:27.863
What about you?
00:28:27.863 --> 00:28:45.455
Like you just keep going through these things and eventually figure out a way to process, or have you had to rely on other people and inputs and actually start to accept it, begrudgingly or otherwise, to move through and process and grow what's worked for you?
00:28:46.558 --> 00:28:49.186
I'm not sure if I understand what you're talking about, except what?
00:28:50.351 --> 00:28:52.636
feedback, insight, perspective.
00:28:52.636 --> 00:28:59.568
Is it just from you, based on your own intuition, or has it also been okay I?
00:28:59.568 --> 00:29:04.363
I don't necessarily understand what you're saying here, but I'll give it a shot and try it and then maybe that works.
00:29:04.363 --> 00:29:12.259
What's been some of the, I guess, patterns or processes that have worked for you to help you grow into you now?
00:29:13.141 --> 00:29:13.982
Yeah, absolutely.
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