Navigating Anger in Relationships
Anger is typically a secondary emotion, often stemming from deeper feelings like rejection or betrayal within relationships. Despite anger being a universal emotion existing inside everyone, it is often misunderstood and mishandled. Recognizing the underlying cause of anger can lead to more effective communication and personal growth.
One of our Ambassadors, licensed marriage and family therapist Bronwyn Schweigerdt explains:
When we validate people's feelings, their anger diminishes. It’s counterintuitive but profound.
The Role of Validation in Managing Anger
Validation is a powerful tool in managing anger. By acknowledging and affirming someone’s feelings, we can diffuse potential escalation and foster understanding. She shares techniques from her practice and her training in de-escalation, which have proven effective even in high-stress situations like interventions by first responders.
The Impact of Early Experiences on Anger
Early experiences shape our responses to anger. There are even theories that unaddressed anger from childhood can manifest as depression or anxiety in adulthood. Through therapy and personal reflection, individuals can begin to understand and reshape their relationship with anger.
Building Self-Worth and Awareness
If anger is a secondary emotion and childhood traumas can lead to adult issues, who do we start to work with? Who is responsible? Some people may blame one party over another, but we can only ever control our own responses. The importance of self-awareness and self-worth in how we express and manage anger. These elements affect not only personal health but also interpersonal relationships.
Practical Advice for Listeners
On episode 22 of Season 5 of Transacting Value, Bronwyn also offers practical advice for listeners who might be struggling with anger or looking to improve their emotional intelligence.
- Be open to self-examination and a willingness to address and communicate one’s feelings constructively.
- Develop a healthy relationship with anger, one that involves recognizing its roots and expressing it in a constructive manner.
This approach not only helps in personal growth but also improves our interactions with others, leading to healthier relationships.
Listen to the full conversation here: Navigating Anger on Transacting Value Podcast.
Follow Bronwyn and her podcast Angry at the Right Things here.
